I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
