hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
where are you?
Hypothermia
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
