yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
