Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
