This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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