He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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