dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
