She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize