then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
