I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
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