How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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