yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Randomize
