Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Randomize
