No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
