What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
