The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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