can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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