whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
