So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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