It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
