Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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