we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
