Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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