god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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