Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
