you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
