Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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