Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
We had sex on a dog bed..
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize