what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
