I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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