Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize