so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
