hell yes lets make some ravioli
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize
