Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
