sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
