So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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