Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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