I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
