whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize