Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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