I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
this just has baby written all over it
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
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