I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
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