Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
