so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Randomize
