i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Randomize
