Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
