her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
