I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
