Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
