Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
